Tag Archives: shift perspective

The Exhausting Lie that Perfectionism Sold You

Summary:

This episode explores the impact of perfectionism, societal conditioning, and hormonal changes during midlife on women’s mental health. Dr. Natalie shares data, personal insights, and practical advice to help women love themselves and navigate this transformative phase with resilience.

Keywords:

midlife, women, perfectionism, mental health, hormonal changes, self-love, resilience, menopause, societal conditioning

Key topics:

  • Perfectionism and its impact on mental health
  • The connection between hormonal changes and emotional well-being
  • Societal conditioning and self-betrayal in women
  • Practical steps to cultivate self-love and resilience

Sound bites:

  • “Relearn who you are and what you want.”
  • “Deserving love even when you screw up.”
  • “You do not have to be good.”

Chapters:

  • 00:00 The Burden of Perfectionism in Midlife
  • 03:24 Understanding the Mental Health Crisis for Women
  • 11:29 The Impact of Hormonal Changes and Medical Misunderstandings
  • 28:13 Reclaiming Self-Worth and Breaking Free from Perfectionism
  • 36:18 Introduction and Disclaimer
  • 37:55 Crisis Resources and Support

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

Resources:

DISCLAIMER:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with Learn To Love Your Story coaching ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠ and her private practice ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities are educational ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic or coaching services of any kind on these mediums.

If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

The Great Unlearning: Reclaiming Self-Worth in Midlife

Summary
In this episode, Dr. Natalie explores the concept of ‘The Great Unlearning,’ a transformative journey that challenges the societal belief that doing everything right leads to a fulfilling life. She reflects on her personal experiences, particularly during midlife, where she realized that striving for perfection and external validation often leads to burnout and disillusionment. Dr. Natalie emphasizes the importance of self-worth and the need to reclaim it from within, rather than through external achievements or approval. Through poignant anecdotes, she illustrates how the pressure to conform to societal expectations can lead to a double life and emotional turmoil, ultimately advocating for a shift towards self-love and acceptance.

Dr. Natalie introduces the metaphor of the tugboat versus the lighthouse to illustrate the difference between exhausting oneself in the pursuit of perfection and standing firm in one’s self-worth. She encourages listeners to reflect on their own lives, identifying where they may be sacrificing their well-being in the name of doing everything right. The episode serves as a powerful reminder that true fulfillment comes from within, and that midlife can be an opportunity for profound personal growth and self-discovery.

Keywords:
midlife, self-worth, personal growth, self-love, great unlearning, emotional well-being, tugboat lighthouse metaphor, reclaiming self-worth, Dr. Natalie

Takeaways:
​The version of you that you’re most proud of may be blocking your actual life.
​Midlife can be an invitation to examine the mess of our lives and love it as it is.
​Reclaiming self-worth from the inside out is essential for true fulfillment.

Sound bites:
“What if I told you that the version of you that you’re most proud of… is in the way of your actual life?”
“Today we’re gonna talk about the great unlearning.”
“You do not need to fix yourself. You just need to find yourself.”

Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to The Great Unlearning
03:49 A Holiday Dinner Reflection
10:20 The Tugboat vs. The Lighthouse
18:10 The Power of Self-Love
23:39 Reflecting on Your Journey
JOIN the https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ Mailing List! Join my newsletter and receive my FREE video and workbook, “Freeing Yourself: A Guide for Letting Go of Other People’s Opinions”

SIGN UP on the website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/762561/109840834025752017/share⁠⁠⁠⁠ DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources): National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠
CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠
⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

How to Make a Shift in Mindset

Ever feel like life is out to get you? It can easily feel like the cards are stacked against us sometimes and shifting our perspective is a wonderful tool to get us out of this mindset. Watch this video as Dr. Marr shares a good example of how to do this from her own life or click the link and read the blog posted earlier this week on this subject.